totally disappointed!

feels like wana punish myself badly..
term test results are out..
i am going to kill myself for it...
the results is totally BAD!
i told myself not to cry for it..
i didn cry...but i cant smile at all...
well, i know its my fault..
felt so sorry to myself...
and my parents as well...
sorry for didn took it seriously..
SORRY!!
next exam will be the last exam for this year..
and it will be a test for myself..
if i done it badly...hmm
then its time to think about letting him down...
admit it, he is everything now...
cant concentrate in anthing...just him...
this time, i am serious...
i want to study hard!!!